Wl - Burpees Make Every Workout a Metcon - Mar 31

My aforementioned ass was really raw meat today. Guess that calls for some deads! Even when no one's looking, there's something to prove.

Buy in:
3x
15 knees to elbows
20 hyperflexions with 12# ball
13 burpees
11.38

4x deadlift @ 225#
5/6/7/8/5
Dang, but if these didn't feel funny. Like I could do them all day, if I could just hold on to the bar. Thick bar didn't help, but into the later reps, just not there to pull anymore. I'll try to make sure I'm addressing the bar properly next time I face these. Not at all sure my hands should be as far apart as they are (outside shoulder width).
14.26

Antagonists:
4x ext/seated curl
10.13

5x calves on the A-frame @ 6 wheels per side
interleaved with
4x 13 burpees
12.39

9 hours/27 hours. 48 minutes total, PE: 8. 219/15.
oGWICn: Day 90, 91 burpees.

Ca - Burpees, My Ass, Again? - Mar 30

3 rounds:
15 knees to elbows
20 hyperflexions 10# ball
10 burpees
10.51

Main set:
4x
8 thruster @ 105#
8 SDHP (same bar)
1 minute rest interval between rounds.
14.40 - not for time, but that's too long for this.

The thrusters really took a toll at the bottom - teabagged them all. Then, gassed going into the pulls. Form broke down reps 6-8 on those, generally.

Finished up with
5 rounds of
12 pull ups
12 burpees
1 minute rest between rounds.
19.48; which, yeah, is way too long for this too, as I timed .39 on the last 12 burpees.

Pretty heavy volume today, or at least it felt like it with my ass dragging from yesterday. Back to back … to back. Wait until tomorrow.

9.5 hours/24 hours. 46 minutes total, PE: 8+. 219/15.
oGWICn: Day 89, 90 burpees.

Cl - Burpees, My Ass - Mar 29

I'm off schedule, just trying to maintain the jist of things with AR weeks right now during the worst of springtime allergy season. If I can hold steady and avoid a upper respiratory infection, I'm ahead in the game.

8 rounds:
11 burpees
(4x)11 squat cleans @ 95#/(4x - alternated with) 11 Ov Squats (same bar)

Rnd 1: 2.43
2: 4.09
3: 4.14
4: 4.21
5: 4.44
6: 4.36
7: 5.10
8: 4.37
9: 2.43
34.36

As you can see by the first and last rounds, I did a lot of resting, but just trying to keep moving while still doing the movements properly. About a full minute between the lifts and the burpees, and the burpees and the lifts. This would be a Wl day if rest was formalized. Good luck with antagonists and a cash out though.

Slinging the bar pretty well, till the final rounds. Nice pop off the thighs on the way up doing the cleans. Yeah, it's light, but I'm still just working on form.

Oh, and there was a time when 50 pull ups and 40 reps of ring dips would've had me feeling them the next day. As it was, I could have done an A day today.
That right ankle didn't bother me today, btw.

9.5 hours/72+ hours. 34 minutes of work, PE: 8+. 220/16.
oGWICn: Day 88, 88 burpees.

P n' P - Mar 28

5x10 pull ups (working on good active shoulders on a kip)
alternated with
4x10 ring dips (working on going deep)

Woulda coulda gone with some running here today, but the sky is full of pollen, and after a day of standing in flat loafers during Kater's Egg Hunt, my right ankle *popped* into/out of kilter. Could hardly go up or down stairs today.

9 + 2 hours. PE: 6.
oGWICn: Day 87, grace.

These Ain't Workouts - Mar 27

So, yesterday it's a Lengthwise check on Friday after a long week of grind. Get home and not gonna have to face a double-down day of burpees again. 4 rounds of 20 burpees with 4 rounds of 20 abmats + 5 burpees to pay up ... dronken. There's a first. 14.48.

Today, did babysitting and some geocaching in the morning, and what with Kater's 1st annual Easter egg hunt and UFC tonight, had to squeeze in the burpees ... and not much else because with nasty allergies right now, I'm just calling these weeks AR weeks. I'd rather give up a week and maintain than give up 3 weeks and lose progress. 6 rounds of 15 burpees with 6 x 15 abmats. 11.27.

9 hours. PE: 7.

oGWICn: Day 86, 90 burpees.

Off Schedule - Owed Burpees - Mar 25

Okay, so you miss a day (granted, delivery of kids to band, so no AM workout, a long day at work, so no lunchtime workout, and teaching JH at 1st Pres, so no PM ... would have logged the burpees, but after my evening at church I was so pissed and burnt that I just blew it all off yesterday) ... you miss a day on this burpee pyramid and you really pay for it.

Played "Death by-Chelsea" with these today to break them up a bit. 2 on the first minute, 4 on the second, 6 on the third, etc, until I couldn't make the minute (happened on the 10th round). Would take another minute to blow and then go into the next round. 12 rounds, and after the 24, did 9 to finish off my I.O.U. 23.06. Three months from now I'll be doing this load everyday.

... I'm doing a lot of raw work. I need to focus on Hip drive or this is all going to be productive, but counter-productive.

Cash out: 3x18 light calves on the A-frame.

8 hours. 219/12. PE: 8.

oGWICn: Day 84, 165 burpees.

Ca - Bullshit Exchange - Mar 23

Headed downtown for session, and no opportunity for workout at lunch. So, there at downtown Bullshit eXchange as loads of ppl stand between me and the gear I need to workout. Wouldn't be nearly so bad if they weren't just standing there talking with each other.

Buy in:
Death by Press (Push Press, but I didn't push) 9.8 rounds @ 115#

Never did the antagonists. Got right into what might have been the Buy in (if there weren't so many shmoes standing around), or the Cash out (if it didn't take so friggin' long), but became the Main set (because it kicked my ass well enough to earn the title):
4x
burpees 21/21/20/20
hyperflexions 21 with 10#/same/20 with 25#/same
10 feet to bar, with an additional round

It's dumb, it's not from the schedule, but it's two things: it's what you can get at Globo; and it's what you have to settle for if you're trying to work 82 damn burpees into the day.

9.5 hours. 216/14. 40 minutes of work; PE: 7.

oGWICn: Day 82, 82 burpees.

Wl - An Inch - Mar 20

Moving fast between NSTA Philly tear-down and Philly at Night double decker bus tour. If it weren't for burpees hanging over my head, I might not have.

Just banged out the burpees straight up. Call it 9.30. They're getting easier. But I still get gassed, the legs feel hollow, and damned if they don't make my right hip and lower back feel like a geriatric.

4x ext/curl

3x 11/11/20somethin Ov Sqt with the pull down bar. Yeah, it's the hotel gym.

It's the last day in the frickin' hotel gym! Rock on.

6 hours /24 hours. 20 minutes of work; PE: 7.

oGWICn: Day 79, 79 burpees.

Ca - Something Better - Mar 19

7x11-10 Pull downs
7x11 Burpees
6x11-10 Incline DB presses @ 45#
Not necessarily for time, but trying to keep moving with no round breaks.
Round 2: 3.05
3: 2.54
4: 2.53
5: 3.46
6: 3.15
1.18 on the final 12 burpees.

A quick something is better than nothing.

6.5 hours /24 hours. 19 minutes of work; PE: 8.

oGWICn: Day 78, 78 burpees.

Cl - Run til You Burp - Mar 18

Buy in: 8 burpees, waiting for the elevator down to the exercise room. Just trying to pay down the burpees owed before it started. Now that the numbers are getting larger, making days is becoming crucial. Doubling down is becoming painful.

4x seated curls/extensions

Main set:
7x21 burpees (partitioned into 7's, pretty much)
interposed with
6x 400 treadmill at 1.5% and 6.0 mph
Round 2: 5.04
3: 5.08
4: 5.41
5: 5.53
6: 6.08
2.34 on the final 21 burpees.

On the final set of burpees, I did burp. Tasted lunch. This is the first WoD in a while where I flat-backed after time.

6.5 hours /72 hours. 43 minutes of work; PE: 8+.

oGWICn: Day 77, 155 burpees.

Ca - Keep It Simple - Mar 15

5 rounds
15 pull ups
15 burpees
18.35

8 hours /36 hours. PE: 7. 218/15.

oGWICn: Day 74, 75 burpees.

Stupid, I Know.

But if you don't laugh, you're a dud.

S - Dinosaur Park Hills - Mar 14

Run to and from Dino Park in Shell Beach.
4x 400 hill intervals in 1.48/1.54/1.47/1.49 on 6.00

3x18 burpees and 1x19 burpees
Burpees took 12.30 after the running? Ugh.

11 - 1 + 2 hours/40 hours. 47.30 total; PE: 8, although that final 100m of the hill was near enough to 100% effort.
oGWICn: Day 73, 73 burpees - took yesterday as Grace.

Ca - Row til ya Burp - Mar 12

Starting with the antagonists these days. I did say that, didn't I?

21-15-9
Pull ups
Ring Dips

Main-ish set:
5x
10 Sumo Pulls @ 100#
15 Burpees
Suck wind and spit sweat as needed.
13.40

Seems like I'm doing more volume than I should right now, but I just feel like it. Lower volume will come with heavier attempts soon, but hi-vol M days are on the horizon.

8.5 hours /20 hours. 27 minutes of work; PE: 8. 220/15.

oGWICn: Day 71, 75 burpees.

Cl - Boi in the Spastic Bubble - Mar 11

I'm buying in with antagonists these days.
5x11 curl
interposed with
4x12 extension
One minute between sets.

Main set:
7 rounds
10 Ov Squat @ 95#
10 burpees
Tap the timer and take a minute blow before starting the next squats. Gawd, this sucked.
Round 2: 2.03
3: 2.55
4: 3.06
5: 3.24
6: 3.18
7: 3.08

Cash out:
4x10 calves on the A-frame/x10 seated calves

One of my last workouts at BodyX. I don't think I'm going to miss that place much. While this was a great workout, the whole time ppl were just eyeballing me. Me, red faced, dripping, gasping and cussing. Them, talking, texting and doing a whole lot of not much. Even Walker won't do this stuff - he was the last reason for staying there.

9 hours /28 hours. 46 minutes of work; PE: 9. 220/15.

oGWICn: Day 70, 70 burpees.

C - Jambalaya - Mar 10

Death by Pullups to start off. Granted, I'm slow, and someday, I'm gonna work on my butterfly. Today, I was working on a brand-new bar on the half-cage at Anytime Fitness, and the pistol grip was so fresh and sharp, it felt like a cheese grater. So the pain on my hands was distracting. But I'm still feeling that the grip gives out before the lats and arms do. Anyway, 9 rounds +5. Lame.

6x 400 on the treadmill at 2 percent grade and 6.0/6.2/6.4/6.6/6.8/7.0 mph
offset with
5x14 burpees

9.5 hours/24 hours. PE: 8.
oGWICn: Day 69, 70 burpees.

Wl - Smokin' but not Broken - Mar 9

4x curls/extensions. heh, the antagonists are the warmup today.

21-15-9
Deads @ 225#
Ov Squat @ 95#
The WoD calls for 135#. I was in the cage at BodyX and had to dump once as it was. 115# would have been a stretch.
Pain Notes:
Man, my left knee had a ligament within screaming at me during the 21 and the 15.
During the 15 on deads, I was partitioning 5/5/5. The first five were overhand grip, the second were overhand right/underhand left (just feels natural that way), and finally, to be even, I switched to overhand left/underhand right for the final five. Going underhand, say, on chins, still taxes my right radius. Today, pulling like that on the deads, I felt like I re-broke it.
No second hand on the clock, but rough time was 15 minutes. I wasn't going for time, but that's baseline.

Cash out:
4x
20 hyperextensions (focusing on hyperflexions now. Compression bad, flexion good).
18 burpees
16 knees to elbows

At the time, it didn't sound like heavy volume. Pretty well spent at the end of all this. Moving the burpees to the cash out is good when there's unlimited time, but it's not gonna work when time's an issue. The rest of the workout's gonna suffer then. But, hey, if burpees had a middle name, suffering would be it.

9 hours/24 hours. 59 minutes, PE: 9. 220/15.
oGWICn: Day 68, 68 burpees.

Wa - Reacquainted with Dip - Mar 8

Been a while since I've been able to do anything heavy. Gots rings in the back yard, but didn't use them this last weekend. Making up for that today.

21-15-9
dips (no problem, straight through)
neutral grip pull ups (partitioned down to 3's)

4xmax reps (5's/6's) push press with 135#

4x17 burpees/
4x17-12 calves on the A-frame

Doesn't look like much there on the page, but burpees suck, and will continue to do so until the Lord calls us all home.

9 hours/72+ hours. PE: 8.
oGWICn: Day 67, 68 burpees.

Ca - Is There Really Any Wa Day Anymore? - Mar 5

Stepped into the gym with the intention to get into some Heavy Hang Cleans or Clean n Press, followed by some of the regular Push n Pull. Two months into the Year of the Burpee (read: 20% finished in terms of time, muchmuchless than that in terms of reps) and the burpees are taking precedence. The buy in today took 25 minutes, and left me feeling like I was runnin' on empty.

Buy in:
4x
20 hyperextensions with 10# ball
18 knees to elbows
16 burpees

Main set, heh:
3x5 Clean and Press with 135#
Not that heavy, and I'm sure that the reps could be there for at least 10 per set, but I just had nothing left. Felt heavy, bloated and slow. Maybe something good is just about to happen … like morphing from tadpole to frog.

9 hours/72+ hours. PE: 8. 217/16.
oGWICn: Day 64, 64 burpees.

Cl - Those Damnable Burpees - Mar 2

We went geocaching for 7 of 7 finds yesterday instead of a trip to the gym. Hey, it's San Jose, and even the mundane caches here are good ones.

21 burpees, then
5 rounds:
x8 DB sqt clean n' press with 40#s
x14 reverse push ups
x20 burpees

8 hours /48 hours. 33 minutes of fun; PE: 8.

oGWICn: Day 61, 121 burpees, I owed from yesterday.

Ar - Burpees N Such - Feb 28

After a crappy show end on Friday - and 7 hours of driving - then an AR-ish day digging out snow forts and hiking up a toboggan run at Wolverton Saturday, here's a day worth logging ... as an AR day ... with 8 hours of driving ... and a tiny workout. Today's grace on the burpees goes to yesterday, yesterday's burpees +1 comes to today, and tomorrow I don't have to do 119 burpees. Everyone wins.

3x19 burpees, plus a demo for Brennan.
3x max reps DB squat clean and press @ 35#

It's nothing much, but it's much better than nothing.

9 - 3 hours.

oGWICn: Day 59, 59 burpees.

Living in the Shadow of the Bay Bridge

Driving into the bay area, I'm listening to the radio and hearing about a guest lecturer at Berkeley - no surprise here - digging deep into his understanding of political history and philosophy and - get ready - bringing to light the evils of the - Obama? Nah. - Bush administration. Wow. Beating a dead horse, are you? Only in SF would anyone buy a ticket to listen. Can't you get this crappé for free on CNN?

Right now when everyone has to end every sentence with "in this economy," caused by liberals forcing banks to sell mortgages to people who proved that they would not repay them, this city of lemmings is going to assign blame on the last administration ... and swallow the We Need Socialist Health Care turd without sniffing it for the shit it is first.

I'm not defending Bush. He was my president when he put that bullhorn to his lips and went after the muslim bastards who attacked us on 9/11. He ceased to be my president when he started giving my money to lazy people who want something for nothing. But Obama? He was never my president. He never did a day of work in his life. He wants to give our hard work to those like him who want my something for their nothing. And there's not a something left to give. We don't have any money left to give. We're in debt, saavy?

Right now, the most generous polls have 56% of the people totally against Obama's communisty health care package. Those uncaring bastards! Don't they want people to get their something for nothing?

If the world was different, everyone could get their free appendectomy. Or Abortion, or whatever you progressive nits think they deserve for free. But the world isn't a dream-economy, and someone has to pay for these things. That someone is me, or my children, or God Have Mercy, my freaking great-grandchildren, because legislators have already spent 4 generations-worth of GNP.

Please stop. In my dream-economy, you people would stop spending taxpayer money on your stupid dirty needle programs. In my dream-economy, you'd balance the budget and only spend what the government took in last year. But I'm not asking you to do what you're hard-wired to do, and waste. I'm not asking you to stop spending my money on idealistic idiocy, because that's how you're wired.

I'm asking you to please stop acting like you're so compassionate and caring, as you force us all into another Great Depression. Your ivory tower care is going to make us all feel the sting of hunger, need, and the bite of reality. Snap the fuck out of it, will you?

Ca - My Kingdom for a Pull Up Bar - Feb 25

Hey, wtf? The hotel gym has a bar that can support my weight. This changes everything, today.

4 rounds:
14 pull ups
14 incline DB presses with 50#s, descending on the adjustable bench
14 KB swings, 50# DB
14 burpees
Rest one minute between rounds (and every 3 pull ups, and between 7-rep burpee partitions, and...)

8 hours /15 hours. 26 minutes total; PE: 7.

oGWICn: Day 56, 56 burpees.

AR - Active, Rest Redefined - Feb 24

I intended to chalk up my burpees for the day and do some sets of feet to bar. Some stretching, and that's all. Really, an easy day.

Work called for me to jump onto I-5 and drive like a bat outta hell to SF, and to another dicked up hotel exercise room. No bar to hang on (no surprise) but hey! Here is a rack of dumbells. More Active, less Rest today.

5 rounds
11 burpees
11 DB squat cleans @ 30#/35/40/45/50
Rest one minute between rounds.

Maybe from all the sitting in the car and pushing forward on the gas pedal, but an unsettling pain in my right knee when going deep during the cleans (but not the burpees).

6.5 - 1 hours /24 hours. 22 minutes of work; PE: 7. 223/14.

oGWICn: Day 55, 55 burpees.

Wa - One of Those Days - Feb 23

3x20 with 10# hyperextensions/2x27 burpees.

3x 7/8/9 with 115# SDHP.

5x7+ chins on gravitron (scaling down from no help)/4xdips

Just one of those days where you just get in and get what's on the calendar done. The burpees came more easily than I might have expected - while I'm feeling overtrained, but knowing I'm not … just overtired. High pulls felt great, chins and dips felt weak.

9 hours /28 hours. 29 minutes of work; PE: 6. 219/16.
oGWICn: Day 54, 54 burpees.

Wl - It's Cumulative - Feb 22

The burpees begin to do their damage early on.

Buy in: 4x
20 hyperextensions with 10# ball/10 feet to bar/15 burpees (8 on last set)

4x 9-10 leg curl/10-12 calf raises.

3x 7/8/9 squat cleans with 103# (jr bar). Cleans felt great on the last two sets. It's mind over matter, mostly - save for the cumulative effect of all that other work sapping all of my strength. heh.

8.5 hours/21 hours. 39 mins of work; PE: 7. 217/15.
oGWICn: Day 53, 53 burpees.

M - MTB TT-ish - Feb 21

Hammertime to the Shaw's. Really feeling the inability to make work in the first half hour (maybe a little headwind) but not pushing the gears I'm accustomed to. A good spin up Rattlesnake. First full ride of the year. Let the suffering begin.

8.5 + 1.5 hours/60 hours. 95 mins of work; PE: 7. 220/15.
oGWICn: Day 52, grace day.

AR - Rainy Day - Feb 20

Quick core burn and today's burpees.
5x13 burpees/5xmax reps (25-15) abmats.

Got in some good stretching afterwards. Used the hula hoe today too, I think that's gotta count for push/pull and some hip drive.

9 hours. 219/16.
oGWICn: Day 51, 52 burpees.

Ca - My Neighbor's Heavy Breathing - Feb 19

Rolled out of bed and right to it. Mrs. Brown was working in her backyard next door - we were both listening to, but not seeing each other. She sounded like she was rummaging around getting chores done, while I sounded like I was gasping from having relations with heavy metal sexbots.

5 rounds:
13 pull ups
12 ring dips
11 1.5 pood KB swings
10 burpees

I know, it's a lot of volume, but I've missed it all so much. Except the burpees. Shewt, I was tempted to add in feet to bar and squat cleans. But I'm saving those for Sunday.

8 + 1 hours/24 hours. 30 mins of work; PE: 8. 217/13.
oGWICn: Day 50, 50 burpees.

M/S - One on the Run - Feb 18

Get right on it.

5 rounds:
10 burpees
.25 on the treadmill at 1.5% 6.6 mph/6.8/6.8/7.0/7.0

8.5 hours/15 hours. 16 mins of work; PE: 8.
oGWICn: Day 49, 50 burpees.

Wl - Make Up Daze - Feb 17

Not many options in the W gym.

4 rounds, starting and ending with the burpees I owed (with some interest).
5x20 burpees
4x
max reps Total Abdominal
12 extensions
11 curl
20-12 calf raises

There's a big difference between a set of 12 burpees and a set of 20. Let's see how day 100 goes.

8 - 1 hours/24 hours. 24 mins of work; PE: 7.
oGWICn: Day 48, 100 burpees.

AR - Feb 16

I didn't do anything but stretch my calves, go to Times Sq church, and drink Honey Porter. I'm taking today's burpees and shovin' them up tomorrow's butt.

Wl - Whatever, Whenever - Feb 15

4 rounds:
Total Adominal
Leg Extensions x10
Leg Curl x10
Calf Press x12-22
Burpees x11 (last trip x13)

Short one trip to the abdominzer (pogue sitting on it). Best I can do today at the Wdubs.

6.5 hours/24 hours. 20 mins of work; PE: 6.
oGWICn: Day 46, 46 burpees.

Wa - Baby Step - Feb 14

Down to the hotel gym with little time but good intentions. Alas, no freaking pulling machines at all! I didn't get a look at the upper body gear before. Just used what was there and got moving.

4x
20 reverse push ups/
max reps total abdominal/
10 chest press machine/
3x
arm extension machine/
arm curl machine

Better than nothing? I'm wondering if a rest day might have been more beneficial.

7 hours/24 hours. 14 mins of work; PE: 6.
oGWICn: Day 45, 0 burpees (grace).

WoD "Susan DD" - Feb 13

"Susan DD"
Run 400m, 20 Push ups, 20 Squats: 5 rounds.

Just a Susan Double Distance. Ran this one on a treadmill at 1.5%; 6.6 mph/6.8/7.0/7.2/7.4 speed on the rounds. 16.45. The runs felt like rest, until the speed started kicking in.

Cash out: 4x11 burpees. Gah, they took 7.42!

8 hours/24 hours. 24 mins of work; PE: 8.
oGWICn: Day 44, 44 burpees.

Cl - Is This All You Got? - Feb 12

Trying to get a little something goin' on at the W Times Sq gym room. Dear Hotel: don't say you have a health club when you are only packin' a treadmill and a bosu ball. HTFU!

Not even a dumbell rack. Most of my plans for this week's workouts were predicated on the existence of some DBs. At least.

Anyway, Buy in: 43 burpees.

Then:
5 rounds
Total Ab machine, max reps
Calf Press x 27 to 17 (adding weight)
Leg Curl x12
Extensions x14-12
Jumping Squats x12

5.5 - 1 + 1 hours/24 hours. 20 mins of work; PE: 6. 217/14.
oGWICn: Day 43, 43 burpees.

Ca "F-250" - Lookit All the Pretty Colors - Feb 11

F-250
50 Pull Ups
50 Dips
50 Knees to Elbows
50 Ov Squats 45#
50 Burpees

BodyX downtown had a couple of guys on the only dipping station, so I juggled the order and nearly did the dips last. On a Cl day, I recommend the Rx'ed order for full … "attenuation."

Pull Ups - 5.37
Knees to Elbows - 5.41
Ov Squats 45# - 4.44
Dips - 6.56
Burpees - 7.15
30.15

Dips took a little longer as I was walking around the gym floor looking for an open dipping station.
Was really feeling the push up portion of the burpees having come right off the set of dips.
This is one of those WoDs that is as hard as you wanna make it. I felt like I was resting too much, but then again, during the burpees, I really was sprouting sweatdrops and seeing the world in technicolor. So.

8.5 - 1 hours/24 hours. PE: 7. 217/17.
oGWICn: Day 42, 50 burpees.

Wl - Days Off Should Make You Feel Better - Feb 10

So, the 6th was Super Bowl Sunday. Did the Pulls and some ring dips on the old bar during the halftime show (the Who who?). Ergo, it's been 3 days since I've done anything but the daily burpees. And man, I felt flat today. Blame lack of sleep and dehydration, methinks.
Anyway, here's a basic Wl day because next week in NYC I won't be able to do any hamstring curls or deads. Off schedule, whawhazzat?

Buy in: 4x20 hyperextensions with 6# ball/4x10 feet to bar/4x(11)10 burpees.

4x10 curls/4x13 extensions.

5x5 deep deads with 205#.

5x12 calves on the A-frame.

7.5 - 1 hours/72 hours. 44 minutes of work; PE: 7. 221/16.
oGWICn: Day 41, 41 burpees.

AR - Valentine's Dance - Feb 5

No time to work out on this special day today, call it AR as I get what I can, and shuffle the week to compensate.
5x max reps abmats/3x 12 burpees. Got in a full stretching routine.

8.5 hours. 217/15-219/11.
oGWICn: Day 36, 36 burpees.

Ca - Burpees a la Carte - Feb 4

5x8 chins/4x15 ring pushups. Ironically, I was partitioning the chins 5+3. I wonder if I'm making any headway at all.

5x7 burpees/5x7 thrusters @ 100#. One minute rest between couplets.

8 hours/30 hours. PE: 7. 221/15-220/13.
oGWICn: Day 35, 35 burpees.

Cleans, Cleans - Feb 3

Bought in with 3x20 hyperextensions with the 10# ball/2x17 burpees. The burpees are mean magic, what the heck, they just drain me.

5x8 cleans with 93#/4x12 calves. Yes, it was a junior bar, and yes, it was light, and yes again, my form blew. Maybe because it was light. But I wasn't feeling too great today, and the weight was less the worry than just blamming the reps ugly and fighting through this general malaise.

8 - 1 hours/72 hours. 26 minutes of work; PE: 7. 218/16.
oGWICn: Day 34, 34 burpees. I've not been loggin' but I've not been missin' either. Got all my days so far... some of these last days, however, the burpees have been all that I've gotten.

AR - Jan 30

Taking it easy today. 4x max reps abmats/3x 10 burpees.

10 - 2.5 hours. 219/12.
oGWICn: Day 30, 30 burpees.

Wl - Pretendin' - Jan 29

Right up front, I wanted to see how long it would take to do the burpees. My minute timer went off at 23 burpees - those last six.... dang.

4x22 hyperextensions with 12# ball/3x11 feet to bar.

4x10 curl/3x12 extensions.

5x12 with 6 calves on the A-frame.

Yeah, the main set was missing today. I ran out of time; not that I didn't want to pull some heavy deads. Se la vie. Booked it out to meet up with CB and Walker, and some Lengthwise Centennial. A good trade. I'll keep the deads inside o' me and cut 'em loose next time.

7 - 1 hours/22 hours. 35 minutes of work; PE: 6. 218/15.
oGWICn: Day 29, 29 burpees.

Ca - Too Tased to Taper - Jan 28

Bought in with 2x max reps abmats.

Then (lookit how we work what's in the pantry into the pancake batter!) folding today's burpees into the WoD:

2 rounds:
14 burpees
16 ring dips
18 pull ups
20 press with 100#
400m (short block)

rd 1: 9.45, rd 2: 10.55. 20.40. The even numbers break down into halves pretty well; count up to the half set, count down to the end of the set. The burpees were just a Work addition to a double push/single pull Ca day with the 400s tacked on to buffer the lactic acid. Isn't that what winter Speed work's for?

7 hours/48 hours. PE: 7. 220/11.
oGWICn: Day 28, 28 burpees.

Wl - Leggin' It Out - Jan 26

Stepping into it with Walker already warmed up and doing his leg presses.

5x10 curls/4x12 extensions progressive from 90-120/180-225.

3x12/10 calves on the A-frame @6/seated with 70# a side; plus one more with 6/45#.

Main set: 3x8/5/8 front squat @155# (which felt like the weight of the frickin' world on my shoulders)/3x8 deads with the same bar. I dunno about the efficacy of this couplet, but in the moment, it feels like it's doing some true good. Because it sucks balls.

Cash out: today's 26 + yesterday's 25 burpees. With a few long stops to suck air; took 6.35 after all the other leg work. Let's see if I can't beat that on day 51.

8 hours/78 hours. 44 minutes of work; PE: 7. 218/17.
oGWICn: Day 26, 51 burpees.

Ca - Over the Hemp - Jan 23

Fishlips with the Sub-T's and some pitchers of Hemp Ale last night. Getting up hurt a bit, but tested the head by flopping it over and back on the abmat. Everything seemed to reset pretty well. Sometimes you just have to get started to get goin'.

Buy in: 3x30 on the abmat, 23 burpees.

4x10 of pull ups/single hand KB swings with 1.5 pood/ring dips. Then another set of pull ups, double hand KBs for good measure.

Cash out: Jog around the block with Boogie and Maylow.

7 hours/20 hours. 30 minutes of work; PE: 6. 220/14.
oGWICn: Day 23, 23 burpees.

Wl-ish - Off Schedule - Jan 22

Doing what I can't do over the next few as we head down to Dineyland for the weekend.

Buy in: 4x20 hyperextensions with 10# ball/4x11 burpees - hey! I'm working those burpees into my warmup!

3x12 leg curl/3x12 seated calves.

Main set: 5x6 deads @ 225#. One rep better than the last time I worked at this weight, and grip felt solid. Last time, I recall having some real trouble hanging onto the bar.

6 hours/42 hours. 32 minutes of work; PE: 6. 219/14.
oGWICn: Day 22, 44 burpees.

Ideal Weight: You're Killin' Me Here.

BMac is pointing to a grid, which is telling me I'm needing to lose 20% of my bodyweight to see my Ideal weight:

http://www.brianmac.co.uk/idealw.htm

180, the top end of the range, down from 220? Are you kidding me?

My next question is Ideal Weight? Ideal for what? For a marathon, it would have to be lower still. For a streetfight, I think I'll stay pretty much right where I'm at, thank you.

I'll give you this though: to do increased work over broad time and modal domains, yeah, I could use to lose 6% BF/12#. Which is to say, I'm willing to give up 5.5% total weight, not 18%.

Wow, I didn't set out here to write that. But since that Marathon happens every year, and the Streetfight may not happen at all, but the Work will - surely, and nearly daily - now I'm going to be forced to make it so.

208. Uh Oh.

AR - Nuthin' - Jan 21

Usually there's nothing to report on an AR day. Today is the first day I'm foregoing the burpees to roll them into a 43-burpee day tomorrow. I'll refuel with Hemp ale at Fishlips with the Sub-T's afterward.

Took the evening to log WoDs and 10 rep maxes. That guy I was, what a pussy! Sure, looking back, he didn't do as much as many times as I can now. Right.

Time to prove it. 223# today, if it's not power, then I'm just winter-fat and lazy. This is the proving grounds.

10 - 3 hours. 223/17.
oGWICn: Day 21, 0 burpees.

Wl - Shut up and Dance - Jan 20

Another one of those days when I'm feeling like huh, maybe I should just blow today off and catch it tomorrow - since tomorrow's an AR day anyway, and I'm feeling flat. Then, enter the gym and it's on.

Buy in: 4x15-20 (or was it 5x?) hyperextensions with 10# ball/feet to bar. Snuck today's burpees in there.

5x10/4x12 curls/extensions.

5x11 Ov Squats @ 45#, 65#, 85#-85#-85#. Yeah, I might've could gone to the 105# and up, but I didn't want to push it, dump it, or sacrifice good form for the sake of ego. Good form though. The weight will come, if I continue to build it.

Calves: 1x12 @6 on the A-frame, 2x12 @6.75/seated calf x10 @2, then 1x12 @6 with the seated again.

8 hours /24 hours. 45 minutes of work; PE: 7. 220/17.
oGWICn: Day 20, 20 burpees.

Wa - What Was I Doing Here? - Jan 19

I can see that my Buy in is going to have to become the burpees here before too long. The challenge will be to do the regular work afterward - like one of those diets where you can pretty much eat all you want, as long as you drink a quart of water before every meal. 19 burpees took 48 seconds.

Had big plans for a Wa day here, but downtown BodyX has gone globo in the PM with nothing but posturing 20-something machos on the weight floor (counterbalanced by a sea of blubbery cardio cows on the machines) - which left me scratching my head to figure out how best to git 'er done tonight. Opted for the straight up 50-rep route.

21-15-9-5 bar dips.
21-15-9-5 pull ups.
5x10 @105# SDHP.
Get the heck outta dodge.

8 hours /24 hours. 31 minutes of work; PE: 7. 220/17.
oGWICn: Day 19, 19 burpees.

Wl - Resistance is Futile - Jan 18

Buy in: 4x20 hyperextensions with 10# ball, 4x14-15 feet to bar.

3x10 ext/curl.

Main set: 3x10 front squat-deadlift with 135#. Yeah, these were the suck. It's not a lot of weight, but the squats are still a challenge for me. Was thinking form the whole way, and found the deadlifts surprisingly draining. Stair check today found my legs feeling a little hollow from Saturday's squats, so I probably didn't have a lot to give today in the first place. Just happy to be here, taking one step forward.

18 burpees took 58 seconds. Finished with 5x12 A-frame calves with 6 a side.

6 hours /48 hours. 43 minutes of work; PE: 8. 220/16.
oGWICn: Day 18, 18 burpees.

AR day - Jan 17

Just did some good stretching today while listening to Walker do some drumming. Feeling a tick in the lower back, blame it less on doing cleans and Hip work than on reading the Eragon trilogy just now in all kinds of weerd postures on too-short loveseats.

9 +2 hours.
oGWICn: Day 17, grace.

Dice AM/PM - Jan 16

Shua dropped by for a mid-morning whateverWoD in the backyard. Boogie got out all four dice (my WoD die, the bike trail run die, Boogie's backyard die, and K-dawg's) ... we rolled all four 4 times, 16 rolls in all with a couple minutes of jump rope to end it all. Did a fair share of squats, 30 ring dips, 14 burpees, a set of cleans, some pullups, push ups, toe taps ... a pretty leisurely and fun day of moderation.

That is, until Dewman came by between playoff games for a try. Warmed up with some jump rope. Got out all the same gear and rolled the dice 8 more times. Not as brutimus as the AM, but it's cumulative, yah?

9 - 1 hours /18 hours. PE: 5. 220/16.
oGWICn: Day 16, 51 burpees.

Ca - The Life Right Outta Me - Jan 15

Buy in: One set of ov sqts with bar only to open up the shoulders.

21-15-9-5 kipping pull ups, punctuated by
7 push presses and 7 hang power cleans with 135# each round for the 4 rounds.

16.16 minutes. The suck was just putting the bar down between the presses and the cleans, and talking myself into picking it back up. Hope I don't have an intestinal parasite or somethin' - just not a lot of pop this day.

9 -3 hours /48 hours. PE: 7. 217/16.
oGWICn: Day 15, 15 burpees.

Ca - Pulleo and Pushliet - Jan 13

It's that time of year. The Globo Gym is packed with vultures.

No Specials! No TV's! No Mirrors! No Chrome! No Pool! No Racquetball! No Tanning! No Cable Crossovers! No Hot Tub! No Pilates! No Step Class! No Body Pump! No Curl Bars! No Head Phones! No Cell Phones!

Just Pain! Just Sweat! Stop looking at me like I'm from another planet and Work. It. People! Jeez!

Buy in: Got today's burpees in the can, then 3x20 ceiling stompers/hyperextensions w/ 8# ball.

Then, coined a WoD for Ca that looked good on paper. Holy shite.

Pullmeo and Pushliet
Strict Pulls x10 (on the gravitron, zero assist)
Dips x10 (same, zero assist)
- 1 min rest -
Thrusters x10 @103# (junior bar)
Sdhp x10, same bar
- 1 min rest -
4 rounds of both couplets

How hard could it be? We're counting reps, it's only 40x4, a moderate day. Right?
Not even remotely right. Damn! Even with the rest intervals, this made my insides churn into gravel. All of the 3rd and 4th rounds were a lot of weezing, bitching, talking to myself, panting and dripping.
Can't wait to do it again!

36 minutes of work; 25 of which felt like my personal circle of hell.

8.5 hours /24 hours. PE: 9. 217/15.
oGWICn: Day 13, 13 burpees.

Nice Turban.

Oh no! One of the ways to stop terrorists is to profile the people that are bombing us.

Profiling: Those free scooter commercials are profiling old people. Cosmetic companies profile women. Beer commercials profile men. Saturday cartoons are paid for by advertisers that profile children. And if you don't think companies profile by race you are grossly mistaken.

The United States government already runs the biggest profiling operation known to exist. It affects millions of people and it's very specific on who gets punished and who gets rewarded. It is called Affirmative Action. Affirmative Action profiling is intentionally constructed to target based on race and sex. I find it ironic that the group that can't be profiled, those would be the folks that are trying to blow us up, would actually benefit under Affirmative Action. Yeah, chew on that one for a while.

Well my friends, in the words of the great John Wayne, "Life is tough, but it's tougher when you are stupid." Yup, I guess it is.

Cl - Death by Cleans - Jan 12

Buy in: 4xmax reps feet to bar-knees to elbows/3x20 hyperextensions. 3x10/12 curls/extensions.

Main set: Death by Cleans with 105#. Been meaning to try my hand at the death by cleans for awhile now. Um, I knew it would suck. Got to round 8 and felt that I wouldn't get through the round, so the 3 I did there were half-hearted. 7.3 rounds. Something to shoot for next time.

Calves on the A-Frame: 5x17-12. Then my 12 burpees for the day. No workouts over the last two days, but I still got the burpees in. 10 and 11, it weren't no thing.

34 minutes of work.

9 hours /72 hours. PE: 8. 219/15.
oGWICn: Day 12, 12 burpees.

What Day Is It? - Jan 9

4x max reps of push press with 100#.

4 + 2 hours /24 hours. PE: 6. 219/16.
oGWICn: Day 9, grace day.

Wl - It's What I Do - Jan 8

4x10/12 ext/curl. 5x5 deep deads @ 225#. 5x12 A-frame calves.

If you can't grip it, you can't lift it. I dumped the 5th set of deads at 3 because … because I didn't hold it. Not couldn't, just didn't. Finished up the set, but it's a grip thing.

30 minutes of work.

8 hours /72 hours. PE: 7. 220/16.
oGWICn: Day 8, 8 burpees.

Nada - Off Schedule - Jan 7

Stayed late, that f*cking catalog in my face again today. Opted for the Texas/Alabama game. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

9 hours. 218/14.
oGWICn: Day 7, 7 burpees.

Hey Co-Workers.

Think of my expertise and good nature as abundant resources, but my time to respond to your emergency as a scarce one. The less of a time commitment you implicitly ask for, the more likely you are to get help from me.
Of course, if your expectation is that I'm going to drop my project Right Now to solve your problem, the likelihood of you getting the finger from me increases exponentially. Or, you may get service with a smile from me this time, and talk to the hand from me for the duration of your tenure here.

AR - Off Schedule - Jan 6

Between fog in the AM, catalog season deadline deadheading, Night of Renewal at First Pres ... no time today for some lowish intensity cardio. Swapping for tomorrow's AR day by doing my burpees and some easy stretching.

10 - 3 hours. 221/11.
oGWICn: Day 6, 6 burpees.

Wl - It's a Kick - Jan 5

Just doing the schedule today. Buy in with 5x20/20-15 hyperextensions w/ 6# ball/ceiling stompers-knees to chest. 6x10 extensions/curls. 2x10 hang cleans with 115#. 21-15-9 calves on the hoist a-frame.

The cleans felt really good. I wouldacoulda done more, but I'm staying on the schedule, and, I'm feeling a little near the edge just now anyway, and six sets on the ext/curl was grueling today. But some nice snap under the bar and good elbows up.

35 minutes of work.

8 hours /24 hours. PE: 7. 219/16.
oGWICn: Day 5, 5 burpees.

Wa/Ca - "Chesty Puller" - Jan 4

Buy in: 3x20/x10 hyperextensions/feet to bar.

5 rounds x10 reps each, rest 1 minute between rounds:
chins (gravitron with 10#)/incline DB press with 60s (descending to flat)/sdhp with 95#.

Cash out: 4 burpees. At some point, the burpees are going to be the buy in and the cash out. Until then, single digits are a relief.

30 minutes of work.

7.5 hours /48 hours. PE: 8. 220/16.
oGWICn: Day 4, 4 burpees.

AR - Jan 3

Not so active today. What a lazy day, skipped church, reading Eragon. Considering how to best make this challenge work, doing burpees isn't going to last the year ... nor should it? Going to break the burpees into the 6 skills, put a 100-rep cap on any one exercise, and move into the next skill set, I think. Until the 100 rep cap though, I wonder about just hammering burpees each day. Think it's only fair to do so.

December's going to really suck, no two ways about it.

221/14.
oGWICn: Day 3, 3 burpees.

Wl - Something's missing - Jan 2

Buy in: Overhead squats 4x15 at 45, 65, 85, 105. 105 got dumped a couple of times. Man.
3x hyperextensions/feet to bar.
4x12 extensions/5x10 curl.
5x Aframe calves.
Had to get movin', no heavy hip drive today. 38 minute workout. I swear I'll pay up later.

7 hours /24 hours. PE: 8. 222/11.
oGWICn: Day 2, 2 burpees.

S - Dice Run - Jan 1

52 mins with a .25 warm up/down. Rolling the 11 burpees /22 pikes / 33 push ups / 44 toe taps / 55 sqts / 66 jumping jacks dice 16 times on the .1 mi marks, with 3 stops for the pull ups on the horse bar and at Yokuts. I neglected to do the box jumps or push ups at Beach park, there was a homeless dood on the bench.

Super oddly enough, out of 16 tries, squats didn't show up once. Burpees twice, Push ups once, Toe taps twice, Jumping Jacks - ah, like 5 times? and the rest was pikes, pikes, pikes ... thankfully.

7 hours /18 hours. PE: 7. 219/14.
oGWICn: Day 1, 22 burpees (two rolls on the dice run).

"Wa" - Not with a Bang, but a Whimper - Dec 31

I needed the AR day yesterday, but was planning on coming back with a vengeance today.
But.

But, fitting end to the year, Life stepped in and forced me to do a push/pull minimum instead of a full-on Wa day:
4x10 chins-pulls/3x10 ring dips. Quick n' dirty.

10 hours /48 hours. PE: 6. 219/16.

Ca - Ham n' Cheese - Dec 29

Ham n' Cheese: 16.51

No buy in, no cash out. Actually, Lengthwise was the cash out.

9!: pull ups, sdhp & thruster with 95#.

Started with 7, then 8, and 9 (my version of a warm up), then 6 down to 1.
7: 1.28
8: 3.21
9: 2.42
6: 2.31
5: 2.03
4: 1.51
3: 1.37
2: .41
1: .33

Late in the game, mostly it's all the transitioning and regripping and wiping sweat off the bar and wiping sweat off your hands and wiping sweat out of your eyes that gets ya. Those things, and the leaning on your knees taking blows.

OML, it's the best 15 minute workout in the world. Loved the looks I was getting from the pogues at Calloway BodyX … yeah, he's cheating on those pull ups … Of course, it took me almost 17 minutes to do it, but hey, don't judge. I'll be back.


8 hours /24 hours. PE: 8. 220/14.

2009

It was a year of Hope -- at first in the sense of "I feel hopeful!'' and later in the sense of "I hope this year ends soon!''

It was also a year of Change, especially in Washington, where the tired old hacks of yesteryear finally yielded the reins of power to a group of fresh, young, idealistic, new-idea outsiders such as Nancy Pelosi. As a result Washington, rejecting "business as usual,'' finally stopped trying to solve every problem by throwing billions of taxpayer dollars at it and instead started trying to solve every problem by throwing trillions of taxpayer dollars at it.

To be sure, it was a year that saw plenty of bad news. But in almost every instance, there was offsetting good news:

BAD NEWS: The economy remained critically weak, with rising unemployment, a severely depressed real-estate market, the near-collapse of the domestic automobile industry and the steep decline of the dollar.

GOOD NEWS: Windows 7 sucked less than Vista.

BAD NEWS: The downward spiral of the newspaper industry continued, resulting in the firings of thousands of experienced reporters and an apparently permanent deterioration in the quality of American journalism.

GOOD NEWS: A lot more people were tweeting.

BAD NEWS: Ominous problems loomed abroad as -- among other difficulties -- the Afghanistan war went sour, and Iran threatened to plunge the Middle East and beyond into nuclear war.

GOOD NEWS: They finally got Roman Polanski.

In short, it was a year that we will be happy to put behind us. But before we do, let's swallow our anti-nausea medication and take one last look back, starting with. . . .

JANUARY

. . . during which history is made in Washington, D.C., where a crowd estimated by the Congressional Estimating Office at 217 billion people gathers to watch Barack Obama be inaugurated as the first American president ever to come after George W. Bush. There is a minor glitch in the ceremony when Chief Justice John Roberts, attempting to administer the oath of office, becomes confused and instead reads the side-effect warnings for his decongestant pills, causing the new president to swear that he will consult his physician if he experiences a sudden loss of sensation in his feet. President Obama then delivers an upbeat inaugural address, ushering in a new era of cooperation, civility and bipartisanship in a galaxy far, far away. Here on Earth everything stays much the same.

The No. 1 item on the agenda is fixing the economy, so the new administration immediately sets about the daunting task of trying to nominate somebody -- anybody -- to a high-level government post who actually remembered to pay his or her taxes. Among those who forgot this pesky chore is Obama's nominee for Treasury secretary, Timothy Geithner, who sheepishly admits that he failed to pay $35,000 in federal self-employment taxes. He says that the error was a result of his using TurboTax, which he also blames for his involvement in an eight-state spree of bank robberies. He is confirmed after the Obama administration explains that it inherited the U.S. Tax Code from the Bush administration.

Elsewhere in politics, a team of specially trained wildlife agents equipped with nets and tranquilizer darts manages, after a six-hour struggle, to remove Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich from office. He is transported to an undisclosed swamp, where he is released into the wild and quickly bonds with the native ferret population.

On a more upbeat note, the nation finds a new hero in US Airways Capt. Chesley Sullenberger, who, in an astonishing feat of aviation, manages to land a US Airways flight safely in the Hudson River after it loses power shortly after takeoff from LaGuardia. Incredibly, all 155 people on board survive, although they are immediately taken hostage by Somali pirates.

In entertainment news, an unemployed California mother of six uses in-vitro fertilization to give birth to eight more children, an achievement that immediately catapults her to a celebrity status equivalent to that of a minor Kardashian sister. But even this joyous event is not enough to cheer up a nation worried about the worsening economy, which becomes so badin . . .

FEBRUARY

. . . that Congress passes, without reading it, and without actually finishing writing it, a stimulus package totaling $787 billion. The money is immediately turned over to American taxpayers so they can use it to stimulate the economy.

No! What a crazy idea THAT would be! The money is to be doled out over the next decade or so by members of Congress on projects deemed vital by members of Congress, such as constructing buildings that will be named after members of Congress. This will stimulate the economy by creating millions of jobs, according to estimates provided by the Congressional Estimating Office's Magical Estimating 8-Ball.

Despite this heroic effort, the economy continues to stumble. General Motors, which has sold only one car in the past year -- a Buick LaCrosse mistakenly purchased by an 87-year-old man who thought he was buying a power scooter -- announces a new four-part business plan, consisting of (1) dealership closings; (2) factory shutdowns;(3) worker layoffs; and (4) traveling backward through time to 1955.

The stock market hits its lowest level since 1997; this is hailed as a great investment opportunity by all the financial wizards who failed to let us know last year that the market was going to tank. California goes bankrupt and is forced to raise $800 million by pawning Angelina Jolie.

The Obama administration's confirmation woes continue as Tom Daschle is forced to withdraw as nominee for secretary of Health and Human Services following the disclosure that he, too, failed to pay all of his federal taxes. He blames this oversight on the fact that his tax returns were prepared by Treasury Secretary Geithner.

The Academy Awards are a triumph for Slumdog Millionaire, which wins eight Oscars, only to have them stolen by Somali pirates.

In sports, the Pittsburgh Steelers win the Super Bowl, defeating some team in a game that we have all completely forgotten. Michael Phelps is suspended from competitive swimming following publication of a photograph clearly showing that he has gills. Baseball star Alex Rodriguez admits that from 2001 through 2003 he used steroids, which he claims he got from Treasury Secretary Geithner.

And speaking of shocking disclosures, in . . .

MARCH

. . . an angry nation learns that the giant insurance company AIG, which received $170 billion in taxpayer bailouts and posted a $61 billion loss, is paying executive bonuses totaling hundreds of millions of dollars. This news shocks and outrages President Obama and members of Congress, who happen to be the very people who passed the legislation that authorized both the bailouts and the bonuses, but of course they did that during a crisis and thus had no time to find out what the hell they were voting for.

To correct this situation, some congresspersons propose a 90 percent tax on the bonuses, followed by beheadings, followed by the passage of tough new financial legislation that nobody in Congress will read or understand.

In other economic news, the CEO of GM resigns under pressure from the White House, which notes that it inherited the automobile crisis from the Bush administration. GM is now essentially a subsidiary of the federal government, which promises to use its legendary business and marketing savvy to get the crippled auto giant back on its feet, starting with an exciting new lineup of cars such as the Chevrolet Consensus, a "green'' car featuring a compressed-soybean chassis, the world's first engine powered entirely by dew, and a 14,500-page owner's manual, accompanied by nearly 6,000 pages of amendments.

Businessman Bernard Madoff pleads guilty to bilking investors out of $65 billion in a Ponzi scheme, forcing the Obama administration to withdraw his nomination for secretary of commerce.

The annual observance of Earth Hour is observed with one hour of symbolic energy conservation as hundreds of millions of non-essential lights and appliances are turned off. And that's just in Al Gore's house.

In sports and entertainment news, former NFL great Lawrence Taylor, appearing on Dancing With the Stars, accidentally rips off his partner's arms during the cha-cha competition. The judges award Taylor 453 points out of a possible 30, citing his "energy'' and "proximity.''

Abroad, North Korea, in what many observers view as a deliberate act of provocation, calls Domino's and, posing as the United States, orders 23 million pizzas delivered to Japan.

International problems continue to dominate in . . .

APRIL

. . . as leaders of the world's powers, looking for a way out of the worsening world economic crisis, gather in London for the G-20 summit, which ends abruptly in a violent argument over the bill for the welcoming dinner. A short while later, in what many economists see as a troubling development, the International Monetary Fund moves into a refrigerator carton.

In other international bad news, North Korea launches a test missile that experts say is capable of hitting Hawaii, based on the fact that it actually hits Hawaii. The United States swiftly pledges to issue a strongly worded condemnation containing "even stronger words than last time.''

On the domestic front, the struggling Chrysler Corp. declares bankruptcy, but its CEO confidently predicts that the company will come back "bigger, better and stronger than ever'' thanks to its 2010 product line, spearheaded by the all-new Dodge Despair.

The big health story in April is the rapid spread of swine flu, a dangerous new virus strain developed by the makers of Purell. Public anxiety over the flu increases when Vice President Joe Biden, demonstrating his gift for emitting statements, declares on the Today show that he would not recommend traveling by commercial airplane or subway. A short while later, White House spokesperson Robert Gibbs assures reporters that he is "not aware of any `Vice President Joe Biden.' ''

In another embarrassment for the White House, New York is temporarily thrown into a panic when Air Force One flies low over Manhattan for a publicity photo shoot. Responding to widespread criticism, Gibbs notes that President Obama inherited Air Force One from the Bush administration.

On a more positive note, an American ship captain is dramatically rescued from Somali pirates by a team of Navy SEAL sharpshooters, who are immediately hired by Dancing With the Stars to assist with the judging of Lawrence Taylor.

Speaking of drama, in . . .

MAY

. . . the finale of American Idol produces a shocking outcome that sends shock waves of shock reverberating around the planet when the winner turns out to be -- incredibly -- that guy singer, whatshisname, despite the fact that the overwhelming favorite was that OTHER guy singer. Congress vows to hold hearings after reports surface that, of the nearly 100 million votes, 73 million were phoned in by ACORN.

But the big political drama takes place in Washington, where David Souter announces that he is retiring from the Supreme Court because he is tired of getting noogies from Chief Justice Roberts. To replace Souter, President Obama nominates Sonia Sotomayor, setting off the traditional Washington performance of Konfirmation Kabuki, in which the Democrats portray the nominee as basically a cross between Abraham Lincoln and the Virgin Mary, and the Republicans portray her more as Ursula the Sea Witch with a law degree. Sotomayor will eventually be confirmed, but only after undergoing the traditional Senate Judiciary Committee hazing ritual, during which she must talk for four straight days without expressing an opinion.

In crippled U.S. auto giant news, General Motors announces a new business plan under which it will fire everybody but Howie Long, who will continue to make what GM calls "some of the most popular commercials on the market.'' Meanwhile Chrysler, looking to the future, invests $114 million in an Amway distributorship.

On the international-tension front, a meeting of the United Nations Security Council to discuss possible sanctions against North Korea is forced to adjourn hastily when the council chamber is penetrated by a missile.

In sports, Helio Castroneves wins the Indianapolis 500, although his victory is somewhat tainted by the fact that all 32 of the other cars were hijacked by Somali pirates. Major League Baseball suspends Dodger slugger Manny Ramirez for 50 games after his urine sample explodes.

But all of these stories suddenly seem unimportant in . . .

JUNE

. . . when pop superstar Michael Jackson dies, setting off an orgy of frowny-face TV-newsperson fake somberness the likes of which has not been seen since the Princess Diana Grief-a-Palooza. At one point experts estimate that the major networks are using the word the word "icon'' a combined total of 850 times per hour. Larry King devotes several weeks to in-depth coverage of this story, during which he conducts what is believed to be the first-ever in-casket interview; this triumph is marred only slightly by the fact that the venerable TV personality apparently believes he is talking to Bette Midler.

On the economic front, California is caught on videotape attempting to shoplift 17,000 taxpayers from Nevada. General Motors files for bankruptcy and announces a new sales strategy under which it will go around at night leaving cars in people's driveways, then sprinting away.

In political news, the Minnesota Supreme Court, clearly exhausted by months of legal wrangling, declares Al Franken the winner of American Idol. Meanwhile the governor of South Carolina, Mark Sanford, goes missing for six days; his spokesperson tells the press that the governor is "hiking the Appalachian trail,'' which turns out to be a slang term meaning "engaging in acts of an explicitly non-gubernatorial nature with a woman in Argentina.'' The state legislature ultimately considers impeaching Sanford, but changes its mind upon discovering that the lieutenant governor, who got into office through some slick legal maneuvering when nobody was paying attention, is Eliot Spitzer.

Political news continues to dominate in . . .

JULY

. . . when Sarah Palin unexpectedly announces that she will not complete her term as elected governor of Alaska, explaining, in a prepared statement, that she has a hair appointment. Asked by reporters if she plans to seek the Republican presidential nomination, she replies, "You leave my personal life out of this.'' Elsewhere in state politics, the FBI arrests pretty much every elected official in New Jersey on suspicion of being New Jersey elected officials.

On Independence Day the nation takes a welcome break from its worries to celebrate in traditional fashion with barbecues, parades and -- as night falls -- spectacular aerial North Korean missile detonations.

In government news, top Washington thinkers, looking for a way to goose the economy along, come up with the "Cash for Clunkers'' program, under which the federal government provides a financial inducement for people to take functional cars, which are mostly American-made, to car dealers, who deliberately destroy these cars and sell the people new replacement cars, which are mostly foreign-made. This program, which was budgeted for $1 billion, ends up costing $3 billion and is halted after a month. The administration declares that it has been a huge success, which everybody understands to mean that it will never, ever be repeated. With this mission accomplished, the top Washington thinkers are free to train all of their brainpower on the nation's health-care system.

President Obama becomes embroiled in controversy when, commenting on the arrest of Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. by Cambridge Police Sgt. James Crowley, he states that the police "acted stupidly.'' This comment angers many in the law-enforcement community, as the president discovers the next day when his motorcade is cited for more than 3,000 moving violations. To resolve the situation, the president invites both Gates and Crowley to the White House for a "beer summit,'' which is described later by White House spokesperson Gibbs as "very amicable'' except for some "minor tasering.''

Speaking of conflict, in . . .

AUGUST

. . . President Obama, in the first serious test of his presidency, announces that he will send U.S. troops to rescue Democratic members of Congress pinned down in town hall meetings by constituents firing hostile questions concerning the administration's health-care plan, which turns out not to be wildly popular outside of the immediate Capitol Hill area. The president dismisses concerns that his health-care agenda is in trouble, observing that "there's something about August going into September where everybody in Washington gets all wee-weed up.'' White House spokesperson Gibbs explains that the "vast majority'' of the wee-wee was inherited from the Bush administration.

In foreign affairs, former president Bill Clinton goes to North Korea to secure the release of two detained American journalists who purely by coincidence happen to be women. Fidel Castro, after nearly a year out of the public eye, appears on the popular Cuban television show Bailando con Cadáveres ("Dancing With Corpses'').

California, in a move apparently intended to evade creditors, has its name legally changed to "South Oregon.''

In an alarming technological development, hackers shut down Twitter, leaving a desperate and suddenly vulnerable America with no way to find out what the Kardashian sisters are having for lunch. The Federal Emergency Management Agency urges the nation to "remain calm'' and "use Facebook if you can.'' Twitter service is eventually restored, but most of the estimated 875 million thoughts that went untweeted during the outage will never be recovered, making it the nation's worst social-networking disaster ever.

Speaking of disruptions,in . . .

SEPTEMBER

. . . President Obama, speaking on health care before a joint session of Congress, is rudely interrupted by Kanye West, who grabs the microphone and declares that Beyoncé has a better health-care plan. No, wait, sorry: The president is rudely interrupted by Republican congressperson Joe Wilson, who shouts "You lie!'' Wilson later apologizes for his breach of congressional etiquette, saying, "I should have just mooned him.''

With public support for the administration's health-care plan continuing to slip, the president orders U.S. troops into Fox News, then goes on a media blitz, appearing, in a three-day span, on Meet the Press, Face the Nation, Meet the Nation, Face the Press, Press Your Face Against the Nation, Letterman, Leno, Judge Judy, Iron Chef and Dog the Bounty Hunter. The president also delivers a back-to-school speech to the nation's students, telling them to work hard and get a good education. Fortunately, thanks to the vigilance of the talk-radio community, many parents realize that this is some kind of secret socialist code message and are able to prevent their children from being exposed to it.

In international news, Iran shocks the world by revealing the existence of a previously secret uranium enrichment facility. Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad insists that the uranium will be used only for "parties.'' United Nations nuclear inspectors note, however, that "Mahmoud Ahmadinejad'' can be rearranged to spell "Had Jammed a Humanoid'' and "Hounded a Jihad Mamma.''

On the international-finance front, leaders of the world's economic powers gather for the G-20 summit meeting in Pittsburgh, where, in a rare display of unity, they vote unanimously to fire whoever is responsible for selecting their meeting sites.

Speaking of questionable site selection, in . . .

OCTOBER

. . . the International Olympic Committee meets in Copenhagen to choose whether Chicago, Rio de Janeiro, Tokyo or Madrid will host the 2016 summer games. Chicago is considered a strong candidate, but despite personal appeals for the city from President Obama, First Lady Michelle Obama, Mayor Richard Daley, Oprah Winfrey and the late Al Capone, the committee -- in an unexpected decision -- votes to hold the games in Pyongyang, North Korea. The head of the IOC insists that the decision was "made freely and without coercion,'' adding, "for the love of God please abort the launch.''

On a happier note for the White House, President Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize, narrowly edging out Beyoncé.

In the Middle East, hopes for peace soar when Iran announces that it will allow U.N. inspectors to visit its nuclear-enrichment facility. Hopes plunge soon after when the inspectors report that they were taken to what appears to be a hastily abandoned kebab stand with a hand-painted sign that says "NUCLEAR ENRICHMENT,'' as well as what the inspectors describe as "numerous health-code violations.''

In Afghanistan, U.N. investigators raise questions about the recent national election, noting that a third of the votes cast for President Hamid Karzai came from Palm Beach County.

On the celebrity front, a remorseful David Letterman confesses to his stunned audience that he has been hiking the Appalachian Trail with female staff members.

But the big story in October, the story that grips the nation the way a dog grips a rancid squirrel, is the mesmerizing drama of a silver balloon racing through the blue skies above central Colorado, desperately pursued by police, aviation and rescue personnel who have been led to believe that the balloon contains O.J. Simpson.

No, that would have been great, but the authorities in fact have been led to believe that the balloon contains 6-year-old Falcon Heene, the son of exactly the kind of parents you would expect to name a child "Falcon.'' It quickly becomes clear that the boy is not in the balloon, and the whole thing is a hoax perpetrated by attention-seeking reality-show-wannabe idiots. In other words, nothing really happened, so naturally the media go into a weeklong Category 5 frenzy so intensive that Larry King is forced to temporarily interrupt his ongoing postmortem coverage of the Michael Jackson funeral.

Speaking of attention-seeking reality-show-wannabe idiots,in . . .

NOVEMBER

. . . a Washington couple, Tareq and Michaele Salahi, penetrate heavy security and enter the White House, a feat that Joe Biden has yet to manage. As details of the incident emerge, an embarrassed Secret Service is forced to admit that not only did the couple crash a state dinner, but they also met and shook hands with the president, and they "may have served briefly in the cabinet.''

In other White House news, the president, in a much-debated post-Thanksgiving decision, announces that he is sending U.S. troops into the electronics departments of 1,400 Best Buy stores to prevent Black Friday shoppers from killing each other over flat-screen TVs. Hours later the president withdraws the troops, calling the situation "hopeless.'' Press Secretary Gibbs notes that the president inherited Black Friday from the Bush administration.

Attorney General Eric Holder announces that, to maintain the principle of due legal process, alleged Sept. 11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed will be tried in federal court in New York City, but as a precaution, "he will be executed first.''

In sports, the New York Yankees, after an eight-year drought, purchase the World Series. But the month's big sports story involves Tiger Woods, who, plagued by tabloid reports that he has been hiking the Appalachian trail with a nightclub hostess, is injured in a bizarre late-night incident near his Florida home when his SUV is attacked by golf-club-wielding Somali pirates.

In science news:

• The Large Hadron Collider is restarted after a 14-month delay caused by squirrels stealing the particles.

• Elated NASA scientists announce that they have discovered ice on the moon, although their excitement fades when they calculate that getting it back to Earth will cost $185 million per cube.

• Researchers from MIT and Harvard announce that they have sequenced the genome of a horse. They are arrested when police discover that "sequencing the genome'' is the scientific slang equivalent of "hiking the Appalachian trail.''

In a troubling economic development, the U.S. dollar, for the first time in history, falls below the lentil.

Speaking of troubling, in . . .

DECEMBER

. . . President Obama, after weeks of pondering what to do about the pesky war situation he inherited, announces a decision -- widely viewed as a compromise -- in which he will send 30,000 additional troops to Afghanistan, but will name their mission "Operation Gentle Butterfly.''

On the economic front, the nation's unemployment rate remains stubbornly high as it becomes clear that the $787 billion stimulus package has created a total of only eight jobs, all in the field of highway-construction flagperson. Looking for solutions, the president hosts a White House "jobs summit'' attended by political, business and labor leaders, as well as 23 Portuguese tourists who got lost while trying to visit the Washington Monument and somehow penetrated White House security. Meanwhile, in what is believed to be the largest Craigslist transaction ever, California sells San Diego to Mexico.

On the environmental front, Copenhagen hosts a massive international conference aimed at halting manmade global warming, attended by thousands of delegates who flew to Denmark on magical carbon-free unicorns.

In the Middle East, U.N. nuclear inspectors become suspicious when Iran attempts to ship to Israel, via UPS, a large crate labeled "HARMLESS ITEMS -- DELIVER BEFORE TIMER REACHES 00:00.''

There are other troubling year-end developments:

• In a setback for U.S. interests in Central America, voters in Honduras elect, as their new president, Rod Blagojevich.

• The International Space Station is taken over by Somali pirates.

• In sports, roughly 40 percent of the U.S. bimbo population announces that it has at one time or another hiked the Appalachian Trail with Tiger Woods.

Also, as the year draws to a close, the Centers for Disease Control releases an urgent bulletin warning of a new, fast-spreading epidemic consisting of severe, and in some cases life-threatening, arm infections caused by "people constantly sneezing into their elbow pits.''

But despite all the gloomy news, the holiday season brings at least temporary relief to a troubled nation -- especially the children, millions of whom go to sleep on Christmas Eve with visions of Santa in his reindeer-powered sleigh flying high overhead, spreading joy around the world.

With a North Korean missile flying right behind.

Try not to think about it. And happy New Year.

Dave Barry

Wl - Deads and stuff - Dec 28

Buy in: 4 hyperextensions/feet to bar 20/10 each.

4 extensions/curls 12/7 each.

Main set: 4x8 deads at 225#. These felt heavier than they might have; maybe because I skipped lunch? Maybe because I can't grip 'em.

Cash out: 5 calves at 5 45# per side.

8 hours /22 hours. PE: 7. 220/15.

Dice Rolls - Dec 27

I love Christmas - these 4 in-between days where you want to exercise, but you don't. Not that you don't want, you just end up don't do-ing. But it's a who-cares blow-off? Not today.

Boogie and I did a bunch of dice rolls, with me alternating in 100# 15-rep push presses.

Buy in: 4 rounds abmats/reverse pushups 15ish each.
Dice looked like KB swings, 2 burpees, 3 pull ups, 1 cleans and 6 sets of push press.
Cash out: 5 mins of jump rope.

7 hours /24 hours. PE: 7. 220/14.

Push n' Pull - Dec 26

Just a quick squeeze-in between Christmas celebrations, staying up too late, naps, and gorging on 7-layer cookies. 4 rounds of chins/pulls and dips for max reps (5/5ish, 3/rest/3ish).

5 + 3 hours /48 hours. PE: 7. 220/17.

Ca - Fran and Stuff - Dec 24

Buy in with a couple of max rep abmats.

Then a 7.31 Fran with 100# bar and a 30 foot walk between thrusters and the pull up bar.

Cashed out with 6 rolls of the dice - turned out to be a pair of burpees, 2 sets of cleans, pull ups and kb swings. That was plenty. Legs still feel a little hollow deep down inside from the Wl/Helen and run. Yesterday was off, but not enough off.

10.5 hours /48 hours. PE: 8. 219/13.

Deads, Met-Cons, & Roulette Training

I'll let Urban speak for herself here.

• Program Initiation: July

The 603's PTP Program
Sunday, 26 July 2009

In keeping with the sentiment of June 22nd’s “We All Want To Be Stronger” post, we’re starting a deadlift and press cycle tomorrow. Yes, I know that CrossFit’s program is constantly varied. But it’s my contention that some physical characteristics have more impact on general physical preparedness (GPP) than others. And I believe that strength is a gateway to improving GPP faster than focusing on, say, balance or coordination. I’m not proposing a comprehensive hierarchy of importance, but for the 603, strength matters.

For the next few weeks, we’ll be performing a 603-modified progressive wave cycle. We start at an arbitrary (easy) weight, then add weight for a few workouts, then drop a little weight for a workout or two, then add again… so the overall trend, of course, is more weight. I originally encountered this program in Pavel Tsatsouline’s Power To The People (PTP), but have seen various iterations of it elsewhere over the years. From here on, I’ll simply refer to it as the 603’s PTP Program.

Here’s how it goes: we are going to deadlift and press 4 times per week. No, that’s not a typo. This is not an intensity-driven program. It is a frequency-driven program. In fact, I do not want you going anywhere near failure. Your body adapts and gets stronger when you stress it and then let it recover. How quickly you make progress on any individual aspect of fitness is limited by how often you can stress that system and still recover between workouts. This is, in some senses, the opposite of CrossFit’s maximal-intensity approach. It’s a maximal-frequency program, but at an intensity and volume low enough that you are always able to recover sufficiently. You with me so far? Good. Let’s look at a hypothetical program.

Since we recently did a 1RM for both the deadlift and press, it’ll be easy to get a rough estimate of where you should start. We’re going to do two (and ONLY two) work sets of 3-5 reps. Do your two deadlifts sets first, then your two press sets. Start with 3-5 reps at 60% of your 1RM, and then do a second set of 3-5 reps at 90% of the weight you used for the first set. You’ll add 2-5 pounds with the same rep/set scheme for most workouts, gradually building strength and familiarity with complex movements.

603’s Sample PTP Program – Deadlifts
Deadlift 1RM: 200 (I like easy math. So should you. Round to the nearest… whatever. Don’t get too carried away with fractional plates or tiny percentages. Remember, this is a quality-over-quantity program.)

Workout 1 - 120# x 5 - 110# x 5
Workout 2 - 125# x 5 - 115# x 5
Workout 3 - 130# x 5 - 120# x 5
Workout 4 - 125# x 5 - 115# x 5
Workout 5 - 130# x 5 - 120# x 5
Workout 6 - 135# x 5 - 125# x 5
Workout 7 - 130# x 5 - 120# x 5
Workout 8 - 135# x 4 - 125# x 5
Workout 9 - 140# x 4 - 130# x 5
Workout 10 - 135# x 5 - 125# x 5
Workout 11 - 140# x 4 - 130# x 5
Workout 12 - 145# x 3 - 130# x 5

This takes us through roughly 3 weeks. Basically, it’s a 2-steps-up, 1-step-down pattern. This pattern is highly flexible based on how you’re feeling, and will require a little more input from you as far as when you go up, and when you go back down. I’ll give general guidelines on up/down, but I’m not going to tell you how much or by what percentages. Start with that 60% of your 1RM, and go from there. If you get to the 4th workout, and the weight was effortless on the 3rd workout, go up instead of down. But… I want all the reps of all the workouts to be gorgeous and easy. In that same vein, if you stayed up late and missed a meal or two the previous day, drop down a few pounds, and don’t beat yourself up for it.

You should not be sore from these workouts. In fact, the first few workouts will be strangely… easy. It does get harder, though. Don’t discount the frequency at which you are performing these movements. Four to five times a week is a LOT. I’ll continue to program buy-ins, cash-outs, Olympic lifts, gymnastics, and some tasty met-cons, but the primary thrust of the next 4+ weeks is: get stronger. A LOT stronger. Don’t overreach, get greedy, or lose patience. This is a slow progression, but very effective in building strength. With a stronger pull and press, you’ll find other previously-challenging activities somewhat… easier. Huh.

Feel free to post questions, but I’d also encourage you to do a little research of your own on linear or progressive wave strength cycles. You might not want to actually do what you find, but it’s good to learn about other (non-CrossFit) training options.
________
• A Sample Workout looked like this (July):

Buy-in
Accumulate 1:00 of the “down dog” stretch
Accumulate 1:00 of Tucker’s shoulder opening wall stretch

The 603 PTP – Workout #3

Deadlift
Set 1: +5# from Tuesday’s WOD, 3-5 reps
Set 2: 90% of Set 1, 3-5 reps

Press
Set 1: +2-5# from Tuesday’s WOD, 3-5 reps
Set 2: 90% of Set 1, 3-5 reps

Cash out
Back squat 5-5-5-3-3-3

You get a day off tomorrow, so go hard on your squats. Remember, though, that your DL and press movements are not to approach failure.

________

• The follow-up: December.

From Whole9: Beware the Lure of the Sexy Met-Con

If you’ve been following our affiliate (CrossFit Whole9, formerly CrossFit 603), you’ll know Dallas builds all of our custom programming around strength and quality of movement. Because of this strength focus, we’ve yet to program a high rep, high volume chipper like the Filthy Fifty. Our met-cons usually come in the form of a short, heavy, simple drill done after a strength or power workout, or a track or “strongman” day where we sprint, jump, throw stuff and carry stuff. We’re in the business of strength-based fitness, and our programming reflects that focus.

A few months ago, Dallas took that strength focus to the next level and created a Power to the People style program. The 603 PTP was a high volume, low intensity series of workouts designed to do one thing – make you stronger. We chose to work the deadlift and press at the same time, hitting both of those movements four days a week, for eight weeks straight. We threw in some gymnastics and Olympic lifting skill work, short, heavy met-cons and a few track days, but for a two solid months, we did a whole lot of deadlifts and presses.

And almost all of our virtual trainees disappeared.

Up until then, we’d had a good amount of people following our programming on line. CrossFitters and exercise enthusiasts from all across the country (and across the pond) were posting after workouts like Overhead Math and the Sissy Test. But come week three of the PTP program, all but a few loyalists had abandoned our workouts. When we asked why, people commented, “the workouts got boring,” or “it seemed too easy,” or “I missed my met-cons.” Fair enough, maybe… but also a crying shame. Because the people who DID stick around put up to 25# on their deadlift and 20# on their press in just two months. And on top of that, they PR’d workouts like “Cindy”, put weight on their clean and jerks and got a lot more comfortable under (or over) a heavy barbell. Boring or not, the PTP program worked, and the people who saw it through reaped the benefits.

People often make misguided assumptions about CrossFit workouts based on what grabs their attention on paper. “Tough workouts”, “elite athletic training” and “high intensity” translates as high repetitions, endless rounds, a grab bag of exercises (often seemingly chosen at random), or some combination of the above. And there’s a trend, especially among those new to CrossFit and inexperienced with programming, to ride that met-con train all the way to Cortisol Crazytown.

I’m here to caution you… beware the lure of the Sexy Met-Con.

For some (especially those new to CrossFit), the lure of something like the Filthy Fifty or the “300” workout is undeniable. Hundreds of reps of various bad-ass exercises all in one workout? That MUST be good fitness. New trainees doing their own programming fall quickly into the Sexy Met-Con trap, piling on the reps, adding more and more exotic movements, needing an excessive amount of time to complete the workout. They get beyond creative, making up workouts so complicated that you need a map and a flashlight just to follow along.

Trainees aren’t the only victims of the Sexy Met-Con pull. New coaches and affiliate owners fall into this trap as well. What looks like you put more effort into your programming – seven rounds of five different exercises with a complicated rep scheme, or “Back Squat 5×5”? What’s an easier group class workout – a 20 minute light-weight met-con, or a structured PMenu-style Olympic lifting session? This isn’t a dig on those coaches or affiliate owners – I get it. The pressure to get creative and put out fresh “unknowable” workouts every day is enormous. There is also a need (real or perceived) to drastically distinguish themselves from their Globo-Gym competition. Add in the pressure from clients to make them SWEAT so they feel like they’re getting what they pay for and the Sexy Met-Con becomes an easy go-to on all counts.

But while it’s an easy trap to fall into – some affiliates never bear-crawl out. I follow several gyms’ custom programming, just to keep an eye on what everyone else is doing. With one, I counted back a few months and found 22 days of met-con out of a month’s worth of programming. Twenty. Two… not including rest days. Another programmed “find your deadlift one rep max” workouts two months apart – without a single day of strength-oriented deadlifting in between. Sure, they did some light deadlifts during met-cons… but how much does your 1RM go up without putting the work in on your 5×5s?

There are a few things wrong with this phenomenon. First, longer length met-cons (even those that go “heavy” for time) will not make you as strong as you could be. Sure, your cardio will improve, and you’ll most likely see some strength gains, but nowhere near the gains you’d see picking up heavy stuff with a tried-and-true 5×5, 3×5 and 3×3 protocol. (Of course, this point is only valid if you believe, as we do, that prioritizing strength is the most effective way to get better at everything.)

In addition, these types of workouts miss the bus by focusing on quantity at the expense of quality of movement. The never-ending pursuit of improved met-con “performance” overlooks the important component of quality-based training. You can learn your nine foundational movements in a group class and “practice” them in a chipper, but none of those movements (performed fast and loose, as these met-cons tend to inspire) prepare you for moving a real load. Sloppy air squats won’t translate to more weight on your back, and a hundred med ball cleans won’t prep you for a heavy clean and jerk. What you are doing, unfortunately, is reinforcing bad movement patterns for literally hundreds of repetitions. And that’s hard to recover from if and when you decide you want to start adding weight to the bar.

Want to be a better CrossFitter? Make sure your workouts are constantly varied, right? On first glance, these met-cons seem to fit the bill. The structure makes you THINK you’re working a good “constantly varied” program, with fresh-out-of-the-hopper movements and convoluted rep schemes. But “constantly varied” means more than just swapping out exercises in your 30 minute met-con. These Sexy Met-Cons work primarily one metabolic pathway, with a very limited range of strength and power. So all those randomized exercises and rep schemes, when contained within the same longer length, light-weight met-con, aren’t really variety at all.

But the biggest danger by far is this – these Sexy Met-Cons can quickly take a dive into “overkill” territory, where your training starts to hurt more than it helps. You can’t tell me that day after day of Filthy Fifties won’t produce a sharp decline in movement integrity, and the overuse of certain muscle groups, joints and tendons. (How many days of kipping, ring dips and push-ups can you do before your elbows starts to hurt?) In addition, the body goes into serious cortisol production around the half-hour mark, so these day in, day out, longer length workouts wreak all kinds of havoc on the body. These kind of met-cons (much like long distance “cardio”) are notorious for pushing people into over-trained territory, and where over-training lives, injury is soon to follow. (Not so awesome for you, but serious job security for Dallas.)

But who wants to work a boring 5×5 when there are plenty of sexier workouts to choose from? I’ll tell you who. People who want to be stronger. Nothing builds muscle and strength like the big lifts – squat, press and deadlift – supplemented with gymnastics skills for core strength and low repetition Olympic lifts to develop explosive power. And I’m not taking a bunch of one rep maxes, either! Sets of 3’s and 5’s are your money-makers – where you train the body and build the strength. Missing your met-con? Work them in, but hit them hard and keep them short. Piling 30 minutes of “cardio” after a serious strength workout is, in a word, counterproductive. And for the love of Pavel, keep them simple. Thrusters and burpees, broad jumps and overhead carries, sprints and swings – all simple, all brutally effective.

M/S - Zipper Ladder - Dec 22

Clearest skies the valley's seen in months after a night's rain. Crisp and clean, the dirt just wet enough to hold ... this day just screamed bluffs run.

Stole a page from crossfit endurance's one minute ladder, but ran a 5 minute ladder down, then back up. Each half was almost just barely enough to get me to the Zipper (5.27 up) and back.
5 min on, 1 min walk, 4 min on, 50 sec walk, 3 min on, 40 sec walk, 2 min on, 30 sec walk, 1 min on, 20 sec walk, 1 min on, 10 sec off, then zipper, then back up the ladder on the return. Okay, you get it.
Really brutus up the emBankment hill, and hiked the zipper itself. Felt like lead mostly, and was really tasting the Giovanni's Pad Thai going up the zipper. The return run was a negative split in terms of what distance I was able to cover, even though I took 10 seconds rest off of each walk (5 min on, 50 sec walk ... better). First real run in a while.

8.5 hours /36 hours. PE: 8. 219/15 - 220/11.

Wl & Helen - Dec 21

How many CrossFitters does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to do it for time. One to film it. And one to complain about proper form.

Today was an AR day, but the power was out at work, and rather than sit around wondering what and when, Wictor and I just booked it to the Rosedale express BodyX. It was surprisingly crowded midmorning, with a lot of ppl on the treadmills, a lot of guys with baseball caps on the cables, and a couple of crossfitters doing some work.

Buy in: 5x10 feet to bar. Then 4x12 extensions/curls, and 4x17ish calves on the A-frame.

Then Helen. Not gonna pick on Wic (one round and ground down), 'cause I was wondering how I was going to do after a full-on leg workout. Had to use the gravitron (no help) as the pull up stations were being "used" by globos, so the first two rounds were dead hang. Did an inversion too, with the pull ups followed by the DB swings (55#), then the running.
Round 1: 5.04
Round 2: 6.32
Round 3: 5.52
17.29

Life is good.

8.5 hours /48 hours. PE: 8. 219/17.

Wa - Still a Little Setzer'd - Dec 19

This was yesterday's workout, rolled over. 6x20 reverse pushups to buy in. Antagonists: 5x12 DB down the incline bench with 50's (hotel gym, that's as heavy as they came)/5x10 heavy pull downs on a Life Fitness machine. The main set was 6x8-10 DB thrusters with 50's. They felt good through the 3rd set, by 6 I was pretty sapped. Blame some of it on Karl Strauss' To the 9's & Blue Moons.

7 hours /19 hours. PE: 8. 220 yesterday? I feel like a tank.

Wl - One for the Road - Dec 18

4 ext/curl at 210/115. 5 calves on the Aframe/4 front squat x8 with 155#. Outy. Just bagging the Wa day til tomorrow, since it's hotel gym time again. Will make up the M and S days to come on Sunday/Monday.

7 hours /24 hours. PE: 6. 220/12.

Love Dare

Here's the full listing:

Day 1: Love is patient

Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. — Ephesians 4:2 NIV

Today’s Dare: The first part of this dare is fairly simple. Although love is communicated in a number of ways, our words often reflect the condition of our heart. For the next day, resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all. If the temptation arises, choose not to say anything. It’s better to hold your tongue than to say something you’ll regret.
______
Day 2: Love is kind

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. — Ephesians 4:32

Today’s Dare: In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
______
Day 3: Love is not selfish

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor. — Romans 12:10

Today’s Dare: Whatever you put your time, energy, and money into will become more important to you. It’s hard to care for something you are not investing in. Along with restraining from negative comments, buy your spouse something that says, “I was thinking of you today.”
______
Day 4: Love is thoughtful

How precious also are Your thoughts to me. . . .How vast is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. — Psalm 139:17–18

Today’s Dare: Contact your spouse sometime during the business of the day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.
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Day 5: Love is not rude

He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him. — Proverbs 27:14

Today’s Dare: Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only.
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Day 6: Love is not irritable

He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city. — Proverbs 16:32

Today’s Dare: Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.
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Day 7: Love believes the best

[Love] believes all things, hopes all things. — 1 Corinthians 13:7

Today’s Dare: For today’s dare, get two sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second sheet. Place both sheets in a secret place for another day. There is a different purpose and plan for each. At some point during the remainder of the day, pick a positive attribute from the first list and thank your spouse for having this characteristic.
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Day 8: Love is not jealous

Love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire. — Song of Solomon 8:6 NIV

Today’s Dare: Determine to become your spouse’s biggest fan and to reject any thoughts of jealousy. To help you set your heart on your spouse and focus on their achievements, take yesterday’s list of negative attributes and discreetly burn it. Then share with your spouse how glad you are about a success he or she recently enjoyed.
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Day 9: Love makes good impressions

Greet one another with a kiss of love. — 1 Peter 5:14

Today’s Dare: Think of a specific way you’d like to greet your spouse today. Do it with a smile and with enthusiasm. Then determine to change your greeting to reflect your love for them.
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Day 10: Love is unconditional

God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. — Romans 5:8

Today’s Dare: Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse—something that proves (to you and to them) that your love is based on your choice and nothing else. Wash her car. Clean the kitchen. Buy his favorite dessert. Fold the laundry. Demonstrate love to them for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage.
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Day 11: Love cherishes

Husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. — Ephesians 5:28

Today’s Dare: What need does your spouse have that you could meet today? Can you run an errand? Give a back rub or foot massage? Is there housework you could help with? Choose a gesture that says, “I cherish you” and do it with a smile.
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Day 12: Love lets the other win

Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. — Philippians 2:4

Today’s Dare: Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse. Tell them you are putting their preference first.
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Day 13: Love fights fair

If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. — Mark 3:25

Today’s Dare: Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to “fight” by. Resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs. If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.
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Day 14: Love takes delight

Enjoy life with the wife you love all the days of your fleeting life. — Ecclesiastes 9:9 HCSB

Today’s Dare: Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he or she would love to do or a project they’d really like to work on. Just be together.
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Day 15: Love is honorable

Live with your wives in an understanding way . . . and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life. — 1 Peter 3:7

Today’s Dare: Choose a way to show honor and respect to your spouse that is above your normal routine. It may be holding the door for her. It might be putting his clothes away for him. It may be the way you listen and speak in your communication. Show your mate that he or she is highly esteemed in your eyes.
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Day 16: Love intercedes

Beloved, I pray that in all respects you may prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. — 3 John 2

Today’s Dare: Begin praying today for your spouse’s heart. Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse’s life and in your marriage.
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Day 17: Love promotes intimacy

He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. — Proverbs 17:9 NIV

Today’s Dare: Determine to guard your mate’s secrets (unless they are dangerous to them or to you) and to pray for them. Talk with your spouse, and resolve to demonstrate love in spite of these issues. Really listen to them when they share personal thoughts and struggles with you. Make them feel safe.
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Day 18: Love seeks to understand

How blessed is the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding. —Proverbs 3:13

Today’s Dare: Prepare a special dinner at home, just for the two of you. The dinner can be as nice as you prefer. Focus this time on getting to know your spouse better, perhaps in areas you’ve rarely talked about. Determine to make it an enjoyable evening for you and your mate.
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Day 19: Love is impossible

Let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. —1 John 4:7

Today’s Dare: Look back over the dares from previous days. Were there some that seemed impossible to you? Have you realized your need for God to change your heart and to give you the ability to love? Ask Him to show you where you stand with Him, and ask for the strength and grace to settle your eternal destination.
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Day 20: Love is Jesus Christ

While we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. — Romans 5:6

Today’s Dare: Dare to take God at His Word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation. Dare to pray, “Lord Jesus, I’m a sinner. But You have shown Your love for me by dying to forgive my sins, and You have proven Your power to save me from death by Your resurrection. Lord, change my heart, and save me by Your grace.”
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Day 21: Love is satisfied in God

The Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your desire. — Isaiah 58:11

Today’s Dare: Be intentional today about making a time to pray and read your Bible. Try reading a chapter out of Proverbs each day (there are thirty-one—a full month’s supply), or reading a chapter in the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John). As you do, immerse yourself in the love and promises God has for you. This will add to your growth as you walk with Him.
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Day 22: Love is faithful

I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness. Then you will know the Lord. — Hosea 2:20

Today’s Dare: Love is a choice, not a feeling. It is an initiated action, not a knee-jerk reaction. Choose today to be committed to love even if your spouse has lost most of their interest in receiving it. Say to them today in words similar to these, “I love you. Period. I choose to love you even if you don’t love me in return.”
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Day 23: Love always protects

[Love] always protects. — 1 Corinthians 13:7 NIV

Today’s Dare: Remove anything that is hindering your relationship, any addiction or influence that’s stealing your affections and turning your heart away from your spouse.
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Day 24: Love vs. Lust

The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever. — 1 John 2:17

Today’s Dare: End it now. Identify every object of lust in your life and remove it. Single out every lie you’ve swallowed in pursuing forbidden pleasure and reject it. Lust cannot be allowed to live in a back bedroom. It must be killed and destroyed—today—and replaced with the sure promises of God and a heart filled with His perfect love.
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Day 25: Love forgives

What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ. — 2 Corinthians 2:10

Today’s Dare: Whatever you haven’t forgiven in your mate, forgive it today. Let it go. Just as we ask Jesus to “forgive us our debts” each day, we must ask Him to help us “forgive our debtors” each day as well. Unforgiveness has been keeping you and your spouse in prison too long. Say from your heart, “I choose to forgive.”
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Day 26: Love is responsible

When you judge another, you condemn yourself, since you, the judge, do the same things. — Romans 2:1 HCSB

Today’s Dare: Take time to pray through your areas of wrongdoing. Ask for God’s forgiveness, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse. Do it sincerely and truthfully. Ask your spouse for forgiveness as well. No matter how they respond, make sure you cover your responsibility in love. Even if they respond with criticism, accept it by receiving it as counsel.
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Day 27: Love encourages

Guard my soul and deliver me; do not let me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You. — Psalm 25:20

Today’s Dare: Eliminate the poison of unrealistic expectations in your home. Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much, and tell them you’re sorry for being so hard on them about it. Promise them you’ll seek to understand, and assure them of your unconditional love.
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Day 28: Love makes sacrifices

He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers. — 1 John 3:16 HCSB

Today’s Dare: What is one of the greatest needs in your spouse’s life right now? Is there a need you could lift from their shoulders today by a daring act of sacrifice on your part? Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can to meet the need.
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Day 29: Love’s motivation

Render service with a good attitude, as to the Lord and not to men. — Ephesians 6:7 HCSB

Today’s Dare: Before you see your spouse again today, pray for them by name and for their needs. Whether it comes easy for you or not, say “I love you,” then express love to them in some tangible way. Go to God in prayer again, thanking Him for giving you the privilege of loving this one special person—unconditionally, the way He loves both of you.
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Day 30: Love brings unity

Father, keep them in Your name, the name which You have given Me, that they may be one even as We are. — John 17:11

Today’s Dare: Isolate one area of division in your marriage, and look on today as a fresh opportunity to pray about it. Ask the Lord to reveal anything in your own heart that is threatening oneness with your spouse. Pray that He would do the same for them. And if appropriate, discuss this matter openly, seeking God for unity.
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Day 31: Love and marriage

A man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. — Genesis 2:24

Today’s Dare: Is there a “leaving” issue you haven’t been brave enough to conquer yet? Confess it to your spouse today, and resolve to make it right. The oneness of your marriage is dependent upon it. Follow this with a commitment to your spouse and to God to make your marriage the top priority over every other human relationship.
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Day 32: Love meets sexual needs

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. — 1 Corinthians 7:3

Today’s Dare: If at all possible, try to initiate sex with your husband or wife today. Do this in a way that honors what your spouse has told you (or implied to you) about what they need from you sexually. Ask God to make this enjoyable for both of you as well as a path to greater intimacy.
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Day 33: Love completes each other

If two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? — Ecclesiastes 4:11

Today’s Dare: Recognize that your spouse is integral to your future success. Let them know today that you desire to include them in your upcoming decisions, and that you need their perspective and counsel. If you have ignored their input in the past, admit your oversight and ask them to forgive you.
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Day 34: Love celebrates godliness

[Love] does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. — 1 Corinthians 13:6

Today’s Dare: Find a specific, recent example when your spouse demonstrated Christian character in a noticeable way. Verbally commend them for this at some point today.
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Day 35: Love is accountable

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. — Proverbs 15:22 NIV

Today’s Dare: Find a marriage mentor—someone who is a strong Christian and who will be honest and loving with you. If you feel that counseling is needed, then take the first step to set up an appointment. During this process, ask God to direct your decisions and discernment.
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Day 36: Love is God’s Word

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. — Psalm 119:105

Today’s Dare: Commit to reading the Bible every day. Find a devotional book or other resource that will give you some guidance. If your spouse is open to it, see if they will commit to daily Bible reading with you. Begin submitting each area of your life to its guidance and start building on the rock.
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Day 37: Love agrees in prayer

If two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father. — Matthew 18:19

Today’s Dare: Ask your spouse if you can begin praying together. Talk about the best time to do this, whether it’s in the morning, your lunch hour, or before bedtime. Use this time to commit your concerns, disagreements, and needs before the Lord. Don’t forget to thank Him for His provision and blessing. Even if your spouse refuses to do this, resolve to spend this daily time in prayer yourself.
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Day 38: Love fulfills dreams

Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart. — Psalm 37:4

Today’s Dare: Ask yourself what your mate would want if it was obtainable. Commit this to prayer, and start mapping out a plan for meeting some (if not all) of their desires, to whatever level you possibly can.
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Day 39: Love endures

Love never fails. — 1 Corinthians 13:8

Today’s Dare: Spend time in personal prayer, then write a letter of commitment and resolve to your spouse. Include why you are committing to this marriage until death, and that you have purposed to love them no matter what. Leave it in a place that your mate will find it.
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Day 40: Love is a covenant

Where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God. — Ruth 1:16

Today’s Dare: Write out a renewal of your vows and place them in your home. Perhaps, if appropriate, you could make arrangements to formally renew your wedding vows before a minister and with family present. Make it a living testament to the value of marriage in God’s eyes and the high honor of being one with your mate.