Thursday, April 12, 2018

Reflecting on Answers and Experiences.

He also gave them this parable: “No one lights a lamp only to place it under a basket or under the bed. It is meant to be placed on a lampstand. For there is nothing that is hidden that won’t be disclosed, and there is no secret that won’t be brought out into the light! If you understand what I’m saying, you need to respond!” 
Then he said to them, “Be diligent to understand the meaning behind everything you hear, for as you do, more understanding will be given to you. And according to the depth of your longing to understand, much more will be added to you. For those who listen with open hearts will receive more revelation. But those who don’t listen with open hearts will lose what little they think they have!”
‭‭Mark‬ ‭4:21-25‬‬

I've been saying this thing, that I have gotten good milage and acceleration out of taking time to re-consider the day prior before moving on into the new one, and encouraging everyone around me to take similar time to review, but even for me, I don't think I'm being diligent enough in it. We've got to reflect, and record, and review for deeper understanding. The unexamined life may actually be worth living, but it's lacking in illumination. It's lacking in direction too, because if you're not seeing what was, you're probably not considering what is, or what might be, either.

I have a pet peeve. This would happen a lot in high school, where I got an early start on decoding film as I was the movie review columnist for the school newspaper, but this still does happen with some adults and still does make me roll my eyes and grind my teeth: Watch a movie, and, leaving the theater, mind whirling with all the points the director left out and questions unanswered and why-did-they-do-thats and geez-that-was-dumbs and holy-crap-what-would-I-have-done-in-that-situations, and you ask the people you're with, "What did you think?" 
And the others say, "Yeah, that was good." 
End of convo, let's go get ice cream.

Some people just want to enjoy a movie and not deconstruct it, I get it. But maybe this is getting worse all across the spectrum of society. We experience, but don't ask any questions afterward. We experience, and - hopefully not - move on to the next experience. We eat and eat and eat and never digest. 
Some of it's the news cycle that disallows us from contemplating why anything happens, only what happens - and before we can ask Why?, the next urgency is before us. We're binge watching season after season and never asking if it was worth our time, or what the motivation was of the maker, or what effect the viewing might have had on our soul. Movies are for enjoyment, not comprehension.

Hedonism is the philosophical trap of thinking that life is for enjoyment (not comprehension, and certainly not self-sacrifice or suffering or any higher motive than pleasure). I'm afraid that current American christianity is missing half the story and half the life because we're all soaking up the blessings and the worship and the miracles and the tasties, but we're not asking the Why of all of these experiences. Never asking if pursuits are worth our time, or what the motivation is of the Maker, or what effect our viewings might have on our soul.

There was a time not so long ago that a christian was expected to have a Bible and a journal. These people of the book also wrote down their prayer requests to track the answers. They wrote down their current questions and quandaries for review after the fact. Where have the philosophers gone? Christians used to be the deeper thinkers and quieter pools.

My pool's disquieted. I've got too many unanswered questions and too many bothersome discrepancies between my experience and what I carry as truths. I'm missing understanding on some pressing sensations and sounds and recurring thoughts and relationships and giftednesses and avenues of ministry and deficiencies in common knowledges, and I'm aware that I'm missing. I'm aware that I'm aware, but that's all. 

It is the glory of God to conceal a matter, But the glory of kings is to search out a matter. Some of what God's got, He's got hidden, only available for those who pursue it. 
So, I've was thinking that I have been diligent in my reflection on what's been, but I'm now convinced that I want more added to my understanding, so I must pry deeper. If, only according to the depth of my longing to understand, much more will be added to me, I must long at a deeper level, and seek and re-seek at a deeper level. 

I must pursue these awarenesses. I must codify what I discover and translate it for dissemination. Or not. If many others do not want to question, then they may not want answers. But I do. I must scratch this itch of awareness and see if answers stop the irritation.